Shovel it

I probably should have read the cold weather snow shoveling tips BEFORE we went out to shovel this morning.
Before You Shovel Snow

• Talk to your doctor before you take on this task of snow shoveling OOPS
• Avoid shoveling immediately after you awaken as most heart attacks occur early in the morning when blood is more prone to clotting. Wait for at least 30 minutes and warm up OOPS
• Do not eat heavy meal before shoveling: blood gets diverted form the heart to the stomach CHECK. Hey! I got one right.
• Warm up your muscles before starting by walking for a few minutes or marching in place OOPS
• Do not drink coffee or smoke for at least one hour before or one hour after shoveling or during  breaks. DO NOT DRINK COFFEE??!?! RIGHT.

While Shoveling Snow

• Use a small shovel: shovel many small loads instead of heavy ones  CHECK.
• Begin slowly and take frequent, 15 minute breaks OOPS
• Drink plenty of water to avoid dehydration  OOPS
• Dress in layers, to avoid hypothermia (low body temperature) or overheating MEH. I'm gonna take credit on this one.
• Cover your head and neck (50% body heat lost thru head and neck) OOPS
• Cover your mouth (breathing cold air can cause angina or trigger breathing problems  OOPS
• Watch for warning signs of a heart attack, lightheadedness, dizziness, being short of breath or if you have tightness or burning in chest, neck, arms or back. DOESN'T EVERYONE'S BACK HURT WHEN THEY SHOVEL SNOW??!

Three out of 12. I'm not a math genius, but I'm pretty sure that's failure. Still. Be careful out there. And watch out for whistlepigs. They are all over the place today.